I’ve been M.I.A. Honestly, life got hard and until recently I had no clue how or why things seemed to be unraveling. Although I had clear sight of where I wanted to end up and who I wanted to be when I arrived at my next destination on this life journey, I felt lost.
Self care practices like massages, time with my girls, and retail therapy kept me afloat. Although it allowed me to pause and care for myself, I quickly realized a homemade spa day wasn’t going to be enough to get me on my feet.
The more I reflect on the past year and the absences I've slipped into, the decisions I've made, and the shifts that have transformed me, the more I realize I’ve experienced this kind of low before. The question became how could I be sure to thrive as I navigate the ebbs and flows of life?
Following my mom's death in 2011, I made some of my most fearless decisions yet. To name a few: I traveled around the world living life as a carefree black girl. I moved away from home with few worries and even fewer coins. I earned an advanced degree at a private PWI while building my doula organization.
This chapter felt different. Pieces of me began coming together in an all too unfamiliar and exhilarating way. I had to stop. I had to become truly unafraid. I needed a moment to be deeply vulnerable, unapologetic, and to make my healing a priority. Ultimately, I had to learn to love the newest version of myself, again.
I had some days that challenged me in every way. I’m talking about no motivation, feeling overwhelmed, and trying to find direction again. Then, thankfully, I had a breakthrough moment. I realized I had to choose myself AND fall deeply in love with the process. As messy as it was, it became my most beautiful manifestation.
My Self Love Toolkit:
As we journey toward self love, my hope for all of us is to experience more tender love, more abundant sleep, more around the world travel, more child-like play, more guilt-free rest, more seamless connections, more unapologetic joy, more breathtaking orgasms, more gut-aching laughter, and more transformative life lessons.
Next up: We're launching our Through Their Eyes: Doulas from around the world series. Stay tuned!